If kisses broke barriers….we all should kiss more often.
When we lived in Belgium, I learned that it was part of French (and Arabic?) culture to cheek-to-cheek kiss people as a way of greeting. One evening I got home and excitedly told my husband “I have just been french kissed!”.
Hubby : “what?”.
Me “I have just been french kissed!”.
Hubby “what?”
Me “French kiss!!! The way they greet each other here. People kiss on the cheek.”
Hubby : “Oh.”…
Off course, my description of “french kiss” was totally incorrect. It is not THAT French kiss. What I meant was the kiss on the cheek. I was cheek-to-cheek kissed by a friend for the first time. I instantly felt assimilated into part of the life and society there. I felt it broke barriers. Since to me, a distant handshake is the usual greeting, so the cheek-to-cheek was very personal. It feels far more welcoming and personal than the stiff handshake.
Then came Chile.
In Chile there is a distinct Spanish culture, as with all other South American countries. But the basic Spanish greeting is still the same. An introduction, a meeting with friends, family and just about anyone is greeted with a kiss on the cheek. I was not aware of this when we arrived here off course. I would give my hand for a handshake greeting then awkwardly shuffle as the person approached my face. AAHHH…they “French kiss” here too, I thought.
I am way too stiff a person to make the first move to cheek-to-cheek kiss someone whom I just met, but usually within seconds one can tell if the person is leaning forward to greet in their romantic lovely way. And phew! I try to handle it as naturally and just as lovely as possible. Haha, not all the time though.
On my first appointment with my doctor, he cheek-to-cheek kissed me! Can you believe!!! I was utterly shocked. Since, well…he is my DOCTOR. I expected a level of distance and formalness, but nope…apparently everyone kisses here. Yet again, I felt a barrier break. An instant burst of my very large space bubble. I was still baffled that a doctor kisses his patient, but that was in the perspective of my own culture and background. In the perspective of Chilean culture, it was a totally natural, decent thing to do.
I still find this new way of greeting people quite awkward sometimes and never know if it should be repeated, how, when and with whom.
I figure this is the natural default greeting with the Chileans and other South Americans (as far as I know), but what about foreigners in Chile? This has usually been the most awkward. We (foreigners) want to display some level of assimilation into the local culture and respect for our new environment. Often times meeting other foreigners in Chile was a combination of awkward staring for 6 seconds, approach with semi-handshake/cheek. and then finally cheek-to-cheek. Trust me, more awkward in reality than in writing. But hey, kisses cure all things right? Once we established who to “spanish or french kiss” usually that is what we do on the next meeting.
Well…gotta go for now.
Beso-beso (kiss kiss)
HybridLiving 